While it is often very necessary to confront someone over unacceptable behaviour just how we do so will make all the difference. Very often the confrontation is only made in the context of a row and this is where heightened emotions will prevent any truth from being heard. To speak the truth in love is one thing but to love to speak the truth is quite another. The latter is where I am speaking out of my annoyance. What I say is laced with anger and judgments and propels the other into an obstinate and self-defence mode. Like nagging, it never achieves what it sets out to achieve. I cannot expect a favourable response from someone I am negative towards. To speak the truth in love is not for myself but for the good of the other. This is where that person feels respected and knows that I am coming from a place where I am on their side and if there is a difficulty we can help to work this out together.