THE PECKING ORDER

Fr Jim Cogley


There are many who are very vocal all year round but who lose their voice at Christmas, This alone is one good reason why so many dread family gatherings at this time of year. There are none like family members who can push our buttons to the extent that all our achievements and adult independence go out the window and we regress into childhood roles that we thought were long obsolete. Fron the moment we gather for the annual get together, parents and siblings demand that we enact appointed roles that we thought had ceased to be. Not only is the long established pecking order back firmly in place but so also are all the age old sibling rivalaries. Growing up we may have been the moaner or the scapegoat; the clever one or the attention seeker and the very act of walking back into our family door places us immediately back in the nursery. Only by being very aware of these dynamics before they trip us up have we any hope of holding onto our adult self.